i like the feeling of being taken care of...
while i've been taking care of people for so long.
having someone to care for me & make me happy
is really great.

i hate it when i have to race with time.
it makes me feel very angry with myself.
making others wait for me again and again...
and i hate dozing off in front of the laptop
each time i try to do my work.
i tried to stay awake, but it's damn difficult.

my life had changed, long ago.
the ade i'm now is different from the past.
not like most of the other 20yr old girl.
doing things that they don't/don't have to do.
as well as not being able to do what they can.

am i happy now?
i don't know. some times i am..
but some times i'm not.
the only thing i know is...
i'm doing things that i won't regret in future.

i hope to do better.
and some things have to be sacrificed.
but i'm still hoping i won't need to lose anything due to this.
yeah, hoping.